Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Plotting . . .

I stare out from my crate every day.  There in my sight is the door to opportunity.  Daddy recently replaced the door handle on the laundry room from a knob to a lever.  I am quite certain I can get my paws on it.  I can't see the door handle because of the kitchen table's corner, but I know it's there.  Maybe I can convince Mommy to move the table closer to the wall by about six inches so I can study the door handle more?  Behind that door handle is the aluminum can that holds a pirate's treasure trove: MY FOOD!!!  I think about this possibility daily.   

I know the treasure is hidden in there.  When Mommy is dishing up our food, she will sometimes turn her head.  That is my chance to dive head-first into the can and grab as much as my mouth can hold.  You would be surprised at how much food that amounts to.  Unfortunately I can never chew as much as I can hold, and I drop it all over the floor giving Hunter and Dixie a chance to grab some too.  This antic has caused me to be banned from the laundry room when it's time for Mommy to prepare our meals.

The next step in my mission is to chew through the bungee cord holding the lid down tightly.  Hunter and Dixie tell me the bungee cord is there because of me.  When I arrived on the scene, I was so smart I quickly figured out how to access the food by using my nose to nudge the lid off.  I also know how to nudge the kitchen's trash can lid open, but I have to be careful with that one.  If my parents catch me doing that, I really CATCH IT!

I really want to open the food can!  There is nothing I like better in this world than FOOD!  I like dawg food, bird food, and even the few pieces of people food I have been lucky enough to nab.  Mommy should be grateful to have me around; she never has to clean up anything she drops on the floor.  I have also been known to clean up a few items she "drops" on the countertops too, but Hunter tells me I'm lucky to be alive to tell that one!

A couple weeks ago Daddy heard Mommy scream, "NO!" and he came running.  He found Mommy sprawled out on the floor trying to hold me at bay.  She had dropped almost an entire bag of M&M's on the kitchen floor and was very insistent that I not eat them.  I didn't see the problem; they didn't look like chocolate.  Instead, they were beautiful shades of pink, red, and white.  Daddy dragged me away much to my disappointment. 

Hmmmm . . . until I learn how to operate the lever door handle, maybe I should focus on how to spring myself from my crate!?!?!

Wags and Plotting,

PS: Betcha wonder how that picture was taken, don't you?  Let's just chalk it up to doggie cam!

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