Thursday, September 20, 2012

Outside Looking In

I have had quite an interesting day.  In my seventy human years, I have NEVER stayed outside all day without the presence of my parents.  I say seventy years in the hopes that maybe Daddy will feel guilty.  Yes, I know I am technically a dog, but seriously, am I expected to act like one too?  [Hummpf]

Daddy went to work today and left me OUTSIDE!!!!  O-U-T-S-I-D-E!!!!!!  All by myself!!!!!  Mommy was shocked when she drove up this evening, and I ran up to the fence to greet her.  She had recently gotten off the phone with Daddy, so she knew he wasn't home yet.  She couldn't believe her eyes!

At first I was traumatized by my predicament.  How could Daddy just drive off and leave me outside?  He didn't even call for me to come in.  Just drove off!  To say Daddy has been working long hours is the understatement of the century.  Mommy has barely seen him during the last three weeks.  I guess an overworked brain and lack of sleep can account for the mental lapse which resulted in my neglect.  I think my sisters were traumatized too.  From my unfortunate location I could see Jenna through the sliding door.  I was locked outside, and she was locked in her crate.  I thought for sure Jenna would discover a way to escape her crate and come to my rescue.  My hopes were a bit too high.  Instead, Jenna began to bark.  That set Dixie off inside of her crate around the corner.  Poor Dixie didn't have a clue what the real problem was, but she felt the need to support her sister's cry for help.  Too bad no one was around to hear . . .

Do you know what goes on outside of our house during the day?  I had no idea I lived in such a hot spot.  School buses came and went. The trash guys came and went. The mailman came and went. Not to mention UPS, Fed Ex, and several neighbors. They kept me busy running around and barking. I had to be a lean, mean, stay-away-from-my-house machine all day. It was exhausting.

Daddy is lucky I didn't take off for greener pastures.  How would he have explained that to Mommy?  Who am I kidding?  There is no greener pasture than my own back yard, and there is no way I could make it over the fence with my two bad knees!  There was also the possibility that someone may have seen a handsome chocolate lab and want me for their very own. 

When it became all too clear that I was OUTSIDE for the day, I decided to make the best of a bad situation.  I chased birds and squirrels as much as I wanted.  I enjoyed the great weather and temperature of a mild 75 degrees!  (Thankfully this mental lapse of Daddy's didn't happen two days ago when we had torrential rain all day!)  I thought about picking grapes so my parents could make more jelly, but that seems to be more Jenna's gig.  I also relaxed on the outdoor doggie bed without any interference from Dixie or Jenna.  Ahhh . . . what a great life I have!  Birds chirping, bees buzzing, nice cool breezes.  Maybe Daddy had an ulterior motive?  Maybe this was his way of treating me to a spa day with no girls allowed? 

Naaah . . . he FORGOT about me!


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